FML, Okay to Say?

I don't really know about actually using the phrase "FML" in everyday speech/text/whatever. What happened to the ever so empowering "over it" to signify one's progression away from a fortuitously shitty situation. Now we slink back into melancholy with "FML." That, and it's an abbrev, can't actually say that shit. It's like dropping an FYI or BTW in conversation. Which, no lie, I have done before. That's what this blog is all about, me coming clean and telling the truth. That and having chicks rail lines off of your cock. You know, just in case you forgot that story. The author should have another story coming up once I can wrangle it out of him. Or maybe it's a her! You watch Law and Order SVU last night? Chicks can have cocks too!

On FML and its very own website, aptly titled fmylife.com I am reminded of this entry

Today, my inebriated boyfriend and I were having sex. He rolls off of me without finishing, and says, "i'm bored." FML

That's the best entry I've come across. I sort of wish I could talk to that girl and tell her it's not her fault. Unless, of course, she's butt ass ugly. Such a double standard that ugly girls can still get laid but dudes have to put in effort to get in there...But I guess that just answers my question. Since a dude can always downgrade to an ugly trick if he doesn't really want to try that hard... no, but then ugly dudes won't be able to get any if all the ugly girls are taken. Unless they're rich. Or an athlete. I'm theorizing myself in circles now... you can tell that I'm writing this right as I think it, right?

In any case, If the guy is drunk he's not going to get off, which is why dude from the above quote stopped. Why would he work himself up just to not get off? You have to stop at the point. It'd be like giving yourself blue balls, terrible idea. And if he gets blue balls he's probably (likely) going to wet the bed while slumbering as he sobers up. I don't think females understand this concept. It's like shaking up a bottle of soda. It's going to release at some point. At that point she'd have to change her sheets. And I know everyone knows how annoying it is to wash sheets on a random non-laundry day. And you know you'd forget about that stuff until right before you're about to sleep and be all like "fuck, I have to wash that stain out my sheets" and then its either A) sleep on it B) stay up and wash it or C) covertly steal one of your roommates sheet sets. Or you can be a G and sleep without sheets. It's cool, sheets aren't that important.

How long would it take to grab a towel and wipe down your face. Like 45 secs? And it'd take 2 hours of hauling laundry around to the wash sheets. Kneeling tall and taking one for the team is much more economical. Or, better yet, take it down (literally) - gokkun style. BTW do not google that word. That's the most economical of all. Takes like 3 seconds.

See ladies, I'm just looking out for you. Giving you the best advice to maximize your utility in this world.

And peep the picture, its of "FML". Which apparently is some sort of drug, bc the picture came from drugs.com....There's not one sequitur thought in this post. It's obviously have some form of ADD