New Jersey: Land of the Burning Bush

I appreciate hard-hitting investigative journalism, as do most people. It's definitely part of being an old ass man. I took a class about the processes of government, in the section about media the professor mentioned 60 Minutes as appointment viewing. Pssh who the hell actually watches 60 Minutes. But now, I find myself watching it whenever I"m home on Sundays. It started innocently enough, forgetting to change the channel after the late football game in the fall. But now its grown, into, dare I say it, appointment viewing. It's like that first meth hit. You never meant to get so far deep into it, but you just can't quit the exhilirating rush of having your teeth fall out. Same with 60 Minutes its superior story telling, production values, and compelling narratives just get you hooked. And it's not just me, all my friends are secretly doing it too.

I only mention this to show that I, as a blogger, do appreciate some journalism. And there's nothing I appreciate more than the cover of last Friday's Metro.
That would be the picture that ran accompanied to the headline "NJ Ban on Waxing in that 'Special Place?'"

Nice.

And the side bar to the cover story?

some ways to ‘clear-cut the forest’

Bikini wax:
Hair removed to the bikini line.

Brazilian wax:
Removal of all hair around the private parts

Sphinx or Hollywood:
Everything off: front, back, sides, the lot. Totally bald.

The Triangle:
All hair is removed except for a sharply trimmed triangle.

The Mustache:
Everything is removed except for a wide, rectangular patch.

Congratulations Metro you are officially edited by 16 year olds...or me. Whomever its editors, this is the type of investigative journalism we have all come to expect out of our nations newspapers. The type of journalism 60 Minutes can't touch. It's no wonder newspapers remain the stalwarts of the industry. Read the entire Metro story. Here.


A-Rod Can't Catch a Break

I don't know when it happened. Maybe it was when he signed with the Yankees. Or maybe it was when he bitch slapped the baseball out of that Red Sox player's hand when he was obviously out. But one Mr. Alexander Rodriguez cannot catch a break from the media. An abridged version of his tale:

• Last summer his divorce somehow becomes an epic media spectacle. Newsflash to NY Media outlets: people get divorced. It happens. Jordan got divorced and regularly dates girls barely over 18. Is that news too?
• A-Rod + Madonna = gross and more inexplicable coverage of the two
• Impropriety within the MLB leads to revalation that A-Rod use d steroids two months (maybe, I can't remember when it broke). It was an anonymous test. How did everyone know that piss even belonged to A-Rod? Did the MLB fail Stats 101? Do they not know what a double blind study is? It's also a sealed court documents. Those things aren't supposed to be opened. Ridiculous.
  
• Selena "I make money of off other's misery" Roberts cashes in by reporting the story and signing subsequent A-Rod Book deal.
• Then these questionable pictures came out in Details magazine last week. Umm. A-Rod isn't exactly making this tumultuous time easy on himself.
• I'd probably make out with my own image if I had biceps that big too.
• And now, there's this. The hooker/madame/Queen Concubine of prostitution ring that provided former New York Governer Eliot Spiter with four figure beejs now reveals that she dated, as well as provide ladies of the night(s), for one A-Rod...whilst he was married. Article from a slightly more respectable newspaper HERE.
  

She just got out of jail (3 month sentence) and is serving 5 years probation. Hey, she's got legal fees and abortions to pay for, why not cash in on A-Rod' too! (the exlcamation point overrides the question mark in this situation, no?). This is her. She's selling a book on her website. She's tempting. But you know you shouldn't. $10 bucks says she has a tramp stamp. Like A-Rod, definitely enlisted the use of (two) performance enhancers, not that any of her "teammates" would care. And she's probably made many a man-bush burn. So was there a point to this A-Rant? No. Not at all. But then again, there's no point to anything that's posted here. .